jamie doom

I’ll be leaving Hainan in four days. I have to say, I loved my time here and definitely could see myself returning. It’s time for a change, and I think living in Hangzhou will provide a nice change of pace (read—shake up my lethargic bum-like existence). We shall see. Here are the top ten…er seven things I’ll miss about the beautiful island to the south.

1. All my friends. When I first arrived here I made friends with a lot of Chinese people. In the past month of so, I have been hanging out with a lot of Expats and that has been pretty cool too. The people who live in Hainan are just some of the most generous, laid back people I have ever met in my life. To my friends here at the college, especially Hope, Erin, Brant, Katie, Jim, and the Mills. To all my Chinese friends, among them: Simon, Cathy, Jessica, Quan, Chen Huang Li, Li Le, Wang, Wei, Natalie and Salt Fish City. Then all my other friends in Hainan, among them: Rob, William, Joshua, Chris, Jenny, Jackie, Eric, Diana, Lido, Ares, Danny, Lui and those beautiful Japanese stewardesses. I got nothing but love for all of you. I’ll miss you for sure.

2. The Weather. Oh make no mistake, I don’t like cold weather. I was raised in the South. These days in Haikou, it’s a chilly 65 to 70 degrees Fahrenheit. I wear a fleece around in 70 degree weather and mean it. I don’t know how warm it is in Celsius here. I think in Celsius it’s much colder, but in Fahrenheit it’s down right pleasant in January. As a side note, when China finally develops into a world superpower, it will eschew that impractical Metric System for the greener pastures of Feet, Pounds, and Degrees Fahrenheit. It does get hot here in the summer. That’s true. I don’t mind sweating though. I’ll miss you perfect tropical weather. I’ll miss you.

3. Linda. My lone English/Ancient Chinese Stick Fighting student that I have written about before here will be missed. Her parents threw me a wonderful going away dinner tonight. Before dinner started, Linda entertained us by wacking a waiter over the head with a stick that she had hastily constructed, at my request, out of a chair leg. Oh sweet, cute, little Linda. I have taught you all the English and Ancient Chinese Stick Fighting I know. It’s time for you to go out on your own. I’ll miss you, and your spinning throat strike.

4. The Siesta. That beautiful, beautiful afternoon nap will soon be a thing of the past. My long days will no longer be broken up with a two to three hour slumber at mid-day. Hainan’s citizens do care about money, but they care about their nap more. Everybody has a friendly understand concerning the nap that goes something like this: If you disturb my nap for any reason at all, it’s ok for me to beat you with your shoes. I will miss it.

5. My Restaurant. I chose a restaurant and made it mine. Its gray dirty walls and playful rats brought a smile to my face in between spicy and palette pleasing Szechwan fair. Will I starve now? After I told the boss I was leaving, he face became solemn and he told me I would have to buy a few more plane tickets. I eat there five to six times a week. Now I think that he, his restaurant, and the rats are considering a move to Hangzhou.

6. Bus 217. The people in charge of finding bus drivers for bus 217 must do drug screening first. Then, if the pee and blood have no traces of narcotics, the applicant won’t be hired. The best of these bus drivers survive only on a diet of Green Tea and Crystal Meth. You can hear the bus driver grinding his teeth from the back of the bus. That’s right! Bus 217 is the fastest, baddest, most dangerous bus in Haikou. Exiting this bus is an exercise in bravery and rolling skills that it only ever truly mastered by hobos who are adept at throwing themselves from moving trains. It gives new meaning to the phrase “Either get on or get off.” But you will get there fast.

7. Moto-Taxis. I have chronicled my love for this type of transportation in the past. I had the greatest Moto-Taxi ride of my life last week. The cops in town are really cracking down on the Motorcycle taxis for a variety of reasons. So, now they have to be really sneaky and creative to avoid main intersections and traffic stops. Last week I was going across town to a new destination. After I jumped on the bike, I was taken onto a sidewalk, and through a cut-out hole in a chain-link fence. This was about 10:00 at night. As we are winding down a narrow dirt path into the middle of seemingly nowhere, I decide this is where I’m going to die. I tried to move my wallet from my hip pocket to my shoes, but this is hard to do when you are riding a bouncing motorcycle in the dark. The motorcycle cabbies and I have one understanding. If they get me there fast, I’ll pay them more. So we are speeding along in the dark on a dirt path when all the sudden we approach another chain link fence with a hole in it. We go through the fence and onto a flat stretch of pavement. I look down as we roll over some familiar looking large numbers and large arrows. I am on an airplane runway. Yes, we have made our way onto Haikou’s old airfield, and we are going the fastest I have been on a bike in China. For a second I even wished I was wearing a helmet. The cabbie and I are laughing like the fools we are. It was truely a beautiful, cool China moment. I don’t know if Hangzhou has motorcycle cabbies, but I don’t imagine they use runways as shortcuts there.

Fair thee well, Hainan.